1. Rather than doing nothing, why aren't you
starting a business when there are many brilliant ideas, as well as resources
available?
Couple of reasons I guess. Firstly, my
education and family environment are not business oriented. My education and upbringing
ask me to help people, build society and nations. In business, the definition
of success is directly related to money making, at least until one touches a benchmark
such as INR 1000 Crore profit etc. I am not comfortable with that. I don’t know
what has happened to me in last 3/4 years- earning money is not at all on my
agenda. Even the news of Asin marrying Micromax founder did not intrigue me at
all (the scenario was not like that during Microsoft days). I do trading and
all finance related stuff just to make myself feel smart and intelligent, not
to make money.
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| Urpad Beel is an excellent business opportunity at Agia |
One more reason may be – I have observed a few
local businessmen in Assam. They are super rich and at par with the startups
who used to come for ‘Young Turks’ of CNBC TV18. These people manage the
insurgents, political parties and Bihu donations. In Assam, the definition of
entrepreneur is like that only, which I think illegal and I hate. So far as the
‘young Turks’ entrepreneurs are concerned, I tried a bit during Microsoft days
and I did not feel the push as I didn’t have the urge for money making. Also, the words such as venture capitalist, ass-kicking idea, break-even, bottom
line- I don’t feel accustomed to. This is not my strong area at all. ‘Play by
your strength’, that I always tell on the career counseling sessions, will be
false for myself.
I used to give another argument for not
starting business – the path is very long until one gets noticed and I don’t want
to invest that much time (same as IAS preparation in twenties). The experience
of my non-profit starts ups gave me the exact idea of the kind of life I would be living being an entrepreneur. But now I think- even the path to become Prime Minister
will be a long one; but I am ready to embark on that. So, I contradict myself
sometimes; maybe it’s the interest factor that matters the most.
In summary, I have no interest in doing
business. Of course, I want to do something like this – open a rubber related
industry at Agia, where I will also have some shares and thousands of people
will get benefit (I find this Narayan Murthy, Ratan Tata type of thinking- they
made money and also changed India); contribute some percentage for auctioning a
river for fishing and get a monthly payment, invest some money in wood mill or
sand/coal mining and keep getting a percentage and help them time to time by
giving knowledge or glorifying the social service part of mining. In other
words, not a full time businessman, but keeping the local business people in good
faith by various ways.
2. Rather than doing nothing, why aren't you joining
a political party?
In Indian context, as on today, my first
data point for joining a political party is not ideology (although I can give a
2 hour lecture favoring ideology politics); it will be personal growth and the kind of people and domain I would be working with. On that context, no political party has approached
me, except LDP. And, I did not approach either. Why?
After seeing the plight of ground level worker
(such as Bhaiti da, Xoru mama who are not blue-eyed), I am certain that’s not the way
for my entrance into the Indian politics. Their scene is like going to a government office
and talking to the peon and feeling proud that you have managed, when you could
have always talked to the main ranking officer. This peon approach reminds me
of the frustrating pain that I undertook with Maa and Deuta, waiting hours
after hours just to have a glimpse of another peon, particularly in Guwahati
for applying some government’s assistance for Deuta’s ailment. So, if I have to
enter to politics some day, this has to be via Shashi Tharoor way or it will
be restricted to Montek Singh Ahluwalia level.
a. But what’s harm in contesting election (assume
they are offering you a ticket) just to get the highlight and you can do much more
with that highlight (for example what Prodyut Bora did); you need not to win
election? My answer would be -No harm, but I myself will not apply for gift
ticket.
b. What if a winning probably party asks you to
manage their election campaign?- If they pay me salary, maybe I will. It would
be a great learning opportunity as well. I always envy the guys in ‘Citizens
for Accountable Governance’, so why not trying by myself? Also, it might open some other
door in the future.
c. Are you seeing politics as your growth
opportunity and not an instrument to help society – Maybe! The current politics
is so nasty that it has corrupted me as well. But if I am given a position, the only thing I
will do eventually is to help people and make my state among India's top five and India in the league of Abdul Kalam's ambition.
I admit I am very ambitious. My target is big, as big as a
cabinet minister in the central government. I have that confident that I can
become an awesomely efficient minister. I am even ready to remain unmarried until
age 45 if I am given a unique and powerful opportunity to serve India/Assam.
Making a mark in human life is more important for me than leaving a biological
mark.
In summary, as on today, I will not join politics.
But I will observe closely, and will be in good terms with all leaders as my
way of entering politics doesn’t need me to attach to any single political
party.
3. Rather than doing nothing, why haven't you joined
a job?
Yes, I want to do a job, but I don’t have a
single offer right now.
- Did I reject any offer- Yes, only one from CFBI.
- Did I
have any other offer- answer is No.
- Did
I deliberately didn’t apply or missed opportunity – Yes. I could have easily
expressed my interest for Jindal or Brookings when I met them in Delhi. But I
chose not to, because I did not want to work with those organizations or on that
domain.
Since childhood, my decisions have been influenced by other factors. Post
Oxford, first time I was trying to do what I love to do. And, you know what- this
is not turning out to be a great experience.
- Why am I not going to Aizawl or apply NISG
again? Because I believe I will insult the Oxford degree if I do so.
- Is this my
ego? - I don’t think this is my ego, rather a determination or an ideology.
- Is
this ideology bigger than earning a few bucks- maybe Yes.
- Going to foreign country or joining back private
sector? Recently, Yes. To be honest, I tried opening up a few doors for going abroad with help
from 2 Oxford professors. This is not working until now. I had to convince
myself for doing that as it was my decision to come back to India. Hmm, I have
made many wrong decisions in life. I am sorry !
So, what kind of jobs am I looking at?
First preference is the Public Policy domain and second preference is the Government
sector. That’s why I was so passionate about the Twitter position and also passionate
about the NITI Aayog or the SAARC position. Is money a factor – I think NO. I
am fine with Rs. 70000/- ceiling for NITI Aayog YP thing, although I can earn
more (I believe) if I would have opted for CFBI.
In summary, I don’t have any offer with me
and that’s why I am not doing anything. This is noteworthy to mention that I am not only
restricting myself to the ‘most ideal’ jobs only; I did apply to a few jobs
that are not quite the type I was looking at; but I failed measurably. This is
the reason why I have start believing the astrology thing; probably this is the
time, no matter how much I try, I will not get any damn job. There should be an
explanation why a member of parliament, a president of Assam’s largest body, a seasoned
bureaucrat or my own merit – nothing has been proved helpful in getting a job,
for that matter, not even an interview call.
4. Why aren’t you writing a book or some fine
articles/papers?
I always thought while I was outside-
given some free time at home I would pen down a book. Now, I am home for almost a
year, doing nothing, but have not written a single line; in fact, haven’t managed
to write a single line. This is an unforgivable offense. I tried thinking why I
am committing this fucking offense.
For a book, I should have prepared myself
with 1/2/3 ideas and a timeline, along with a routine. To be honest, I never
thought I would stay at home for these many days. Even, till today, I have not brought out
many cloths out of my suitcase, as I kept that ready for my next destination.
At any point of time (for example, while writing the due date on the borrowing
books of the library), I think- ‘I might not be at Agia by that time). The AASU
meeting, Nischal’s visit, Moina’s homecoming, my birthday, and finally I
stopped setting up own timelines. This unrest condition prevented me from
starting many activities- writing is one of them.
But why not starting from today, now?
Because, my mental energy is at such a low level that I would not be able to produce quality
materials for sure. I was trying to concentrate on a few ideas, gosh! I can’t even
proceed with the creative thinking.
But what about writing an article at least?
Yes, that should not be excuse any more. This blog-post is one such step (to
contribute to the future auto biographer- at least this blog is a good thing I
did). After publishing the insurgency article in AKB, I will start writing the
Indian policy-making article. A conversation is going on with Shamim for paper
as well.
God help me- I will give tiny steps to
correct myself. Here is a lesson though- next time whenever I would take a
break, the only priority will be to pen down a book. The idea, routine, style
of writing would be decided before I reach Agia. There has to be one hour in
seclusion everyday to write stuff.
5. Why aren’t you making your non-profits bigger, a
social entrepreneur in real sense?
A portion of the answer for this question lies
in the above question of starting a business. The concept of NGOs is so demeaning
in Assam/India, that I avoid saying the word NGO these days. The impact is very
limited unless you reach a particular level. Also, I think there are bigger
stuffs to take care than increasing reading appetite, doing career counseling
or doing xahitya Unicode etc. People are
dying, there are riots, corruptions changing behavior–these need urgent
attention. There has to be some people working on those complex areas, and I
love to volunteer for that.
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| Career counseling at Dudhnoi college for Xomidhan |
At the same time, I hate the social
worker concept. I don’t want to be an object of sympathy for doing social
service. I want to change societies and build nations. And, in India, only
governments/politics can give me that opportunity.I have worked with Ashoka fellows, Magsaysay award winners- but they don't influence me the way Modi or Arvind Kejriwal(the politician) influences me, or even Himanta Biswa to an extent.
The arguments of impact, credibility,
interest are also applicable why I am not keen of applying fund from Raj Ram
Mohan Ray Library or Reeta Choudhury’s NBT. Getting some amount of money is
great, but the actual impact is not at all aligned to what I want to achieve. The flood-livelihood program was an exception as there was local expectation and the distress was too much.
By the way, am I wrong? Looking at the efforts of Abul
Kalam Azad, Tarun Cherukuri, Prakhar, Anshu Gupta- hmm, I am not quite sure.
But, I have little trust on the NGO concept these days and this is the biggest reason.
NB: Taking decision is always difficult and our thinking process changes with age and circumstances. I hope this post, after 10 years, will help to track the evolution of Zing.
