First post of 2025 with FY review

We are already into the fifth month of 2025 and this is my first post of this year, that too a compulsory post. The work, study and family have taken over completely, leaving me with little time for my 'want' things. 

Income from knowledge that I wanna more

From the last FY, I started dividing my expenses into three categories - need, want and investment. Now, if I do a calculation for the year, my expenses on 'needs' are around 52% of my total yearly income, want - 5% and investment is around 66% of my total yearly income. Of course, as you might have guessed, my total outflow is 116% of my total inflow. However, there is no drastic change in this pattern of overly spending. In coming years,  I would expect the Need percentage to come down once more salary components are added, which was a major hurdle of the last FY. 

Getting a job was the priority when this FY started. Finally I joined one on 5 Sept. This had multiple implications on my finances of last year, most of them are negative.

1) No salary input drastically reduced my total earning of last FY. I earned ~24.4 Lakh (under all heads) which is around 12 lakh less than that of previous FY. 

2) Income from knowledge or business was a disappointment. Although I was completely free to attend any kind of seminar/workshop, I believe, nobody calls an unemployed person. Majority of earning under this head (say, MATI) happened only after I joined in Shillong. The summary is - if I have to plan a regular income from knowledge, this has to be planned out, it won't happen just like that. 

3) There is no real increment in my salary post joining as SeMT Head. In fact, it got reduced a little. Also, the monthly expenses skyrocketed as I moved out of house. That's on a financial standpoint. From all other angles, moving out of Agia was a good decision. Summary- never evaluate only the financial angle in any decision making. Life is beautiful because it is complex with multiple dimensions. 

4) The hacking of WazirX put a dead end to my Crypto currency experiment. After Trump became president again, I tried to buy some more currencies, but WazirX is not allowing. I also don't have knowledge and confidence to try out again in different platforms. 

However, let me look at the positive sides now, at least that are promising at present.

1) The earning from dividend (including SGB interests) touched around 62K in the last FY. My target should be to touch 1L per annum only from dividend, excluding the stock sell. Of course it is dependent on the market performance and dividend decisions. But, I should set a target.

2) The creation of recurring income flow from Mridul and Maa is another welcome step. The amount crossed 1 Lakh in the last FY. With Mridul, the invested amount is 3L now, and will be increased to 4L from May'25 onwards. For Maa, I can't be that strict; for example, she didn't pay two instalments in last FY, and I don't want to remind her formally.

3) I am also happy that my interest from PPF account finally crossed 1 lakh in the last FY. In fact, the total interest from savings and emergency FDs itself touched 90K around. This can be another target for next year to cross 1 L. Plan out. 

4) My total equity investment (includes Zerodha, MFs and SIPs) for the last FY is 10.81 Lakh - almost double than that of my non-equity investment such as PPF, SSY, NPS etc. With the target to have 1 Cr equity portfolio, I must invest around 6 Lakh per year (with some weird and questionable assumptions). By far, I believe, this FY witnessed my highest annual equity investment. Market was also down, and I am glad to invest the amount.

5) I tried new financial instruments such as NPS Vatsalya for Rodali and RBI treasury bills via Nina. Both are experiments only and I need to gain further knowledge.

Some realisation and thoughts:

1) For immovable asset, I am in no mood to invest further in land, at least by putting own efforts. The first priority is to set the boundary and other things straight for the already acquired land spots in Mirza, Dudhnoi and also at Dalok, Agia College, Samaguri and Boragaon (for family). Many things are in hanging state in these plots. Karuna Da offered me some land near the plot he bought; I am a bit reluctant. 

2) I no longer want to learn about futures and options after the volatility shown by the market and the statistics of the retail traders as displayed by SEBI. However, I need to formulate the strategy for selling.

3) Investing in self and Nina's career is something I am very convinced. Nina's ambition for doing PhD and the related expenses are huge forthcoming liabilities, which, I am simply writing as investment. I am also not much worried about the course fee increase at IITG for part time students and the monthly rent I am paying for the MSH. I am thankful that I have developed this mindset of 'investing in yourself'. 

4) Although I am still not at that financial position to 'leave job anytime', but I am at a certain comfort level w.r.t. my financial health. This gives me immense pleasure and confidence. I am so grateful (to myself?) for taking certain decisions such as not taking house-loan, not buying expensive vehicle, not marrying an expensive wife, not borrowing and lending from people etc. 

Inflow Table: 

	Salary(rmbsmnt, bonus)	Market (selling of equity, Dividend, settlement, SGB Interest etc)	Loan Repay(includes EMI interest)	Bank Interest (Savings, FD)	Income-one time (knowledge/ business )	Others	Secondary recurrimg Income	Total
April		1815	30000				11500	₹ 43,315
May				9083		444	9000	₹ 18,527
June		5399	12680	14769	1000		9000	₹ 42,848
July		3619				47510	11000	₹ 62,129
August		7925			54099		11000	₹ 73,024
Sept	244872	8963		39591		11111	11000	₹ 315,537
Oct	282544	3364					11000	₹ 296,908
Nov	262456	8763			3000	100	13000	₹ 287,319
Dec	246394	2342		11892			11000	₹ 271,628
Jan	245422	1832			9900	54488	4000	₹ 315,642
Feb	332616	6798				1000	7000	₹ 347,414
Mar	230906	11327		118159			10000	₹ 370,392
Total	1845210	62147	42680	193494	67999	114653	118500	₹ 2,444,683
% of total income	75.48%	2.54%	1.75%	7.91%	2.78%	4.69%	4.85%

Outflow table:

	Regular	Food	Personal	Childcare	Transport	Tax-Debt	Social Obligation	Gift-Donate	Recreation	First-Unique	Equity	Other Invt	Total
April	8600	6959	5873	489	4175	0	2000	6750	416	0	28272	125630	189164
May	8825	5223	4360	1670	9044	12620	1084	2671	28186	315	54500	35630	164128
June	5367	8169	910	450	8213	0	4605	2435	50	23160	129500	2130	184989
July	5105	3784	12967	1410	2300	2510	0	7254	2148	0	101283	205730	344491
August	4900	10528	6195	1311	5331	0	0	1356	939	0	63110	30630	124300
Sept	132858	9320	11953	290	5751	0	28013	4674	3166	1300	78100	28457	303882
Oct	22645	5113	3285	0	5411	0	11256	4109	1309	0	146480	15430	215038
Nov	27831	5144	11756	1413	5991	41198	13892	3840	4259	0	98700	15430	229454
Dec	23200	6059	77662	3481	7605	65489	12754	4642	100	0	55000	15430	271422
Jan	39719	8276	210828	1875	8790	41198	14456	3455	1930	0	130230	15430	330527
Feb	31705	6108	16472	0	2560	51636	12000	1070	1862	0	128868	15430	267711
Mar	23444	4826	25142	2098	6466	51960	12782	4119	3746	640	67000	15430	217653
	334,199	79,509	387,403	14,487	71,637	266,611	112,842	46,375	48,111	25,415	1,081,043	520,787	2,842,759
% wrt total income	13.67%	3.25%	15.85%	0.59%	2.93%	10.91%	4.62%	1.90%	1.97%	1.04%	44.22%	21.30%	116.28%

Looking Back 2024

First time I am publishing year review blogpost in that same year! Good job Zing!

When I think about 2024, four things clearly stand out - 1) the unceremonious exit from CSoD, 2)the 7-month long jobless period, 3) the new life at Shillong and 4) the gallstone surgery-my first hospitalization of human life. Two things continued throughout the year with lot of attention- seeing growing Rodali and my PhD. 

Was last year great? The answer would be negative. Is it showing signs of recovery? Oh yes, very much! 

1) CSoD- the year started with bad vibes when Atul was ousted and Sameer was made the project director. But the final blow came on 12 Jan, when he and HR setup call with me to question on my performance. Somehow, I took the whole episode as an attempt to break out the middle class jinx of 'pleading for saving livelihood'. Although Mukesh and Harsha requested me to withdraw resignation, I didn't move as they hurt my ego. At the same time, the Assam Govt interview also went fabulous. I got freed on 9 Feb. Enough has been written about this in this post.

In a hindsight, I often question whether the decision to resign without any option is wise. I remember about post Oxford time. However, when I heard about the forced resignation of the whole FSP team later this year, I thanked my instinct. I had turmoil towards the middle of the year, more because of Nina's deteriorating chemistry with Maa than of my financial position. To conclude, leaving a stupid job is any day welcome, just think about the environment you are living- whether they consider a jobless person worthless or someone who is trying new stuffs.

2)Jobless period -  I think, while jobless, the main challenge was to bring discipline and a routine, but Rodali made it impossible. The tangible output of the day is something I started tracking by including a section "Tasks done" in the diary. Nevertheless, I kept asking myself why bad career times keep coming to my life even when I am at the peak of my luck/planet. I don't want to write about the frustration of this period here today. Handling Nina at different instants was a huge challenge. Particularly with Maa multiple times, one day with Prafulla Khura, her own repeated failures on exams. The fact that she is not able to manage self-time made her devastated and angry at times, which Maa can't understand and appreciate, hence I need to handle all alone. Provided I would have got the married scholar hostel at IITG by May- June, the whole story of joblessness would have been different. 

I must admit- when I am reviewing all the activities of the year today, much of these would not have been possible if I would have stuck to the bullshit job at CSoD. Selling the 2 laptops and enhancing the desktops, going for fishing in shiny night, getting donation from Hrishikesh Goswami for the library are just a few activities I pursued without being in a job.

With my boss

3) The Shillong chapter -  I never thought even once about a career relocation to Shillong in the starting of the year (or even in life). The twists and turns in snatching away the position of Head SeMT in Assam from me is already mentioned here. Sunil sir (whom I started hating post that episode, but had to host at Shillong later) told it was CEO, NeGD who altered this seemingly obvious and straight decision. But professionally, shifting to Shillong gave me an unexpected upward thrust. The confidence bestowed upon me by Bah Nongbri, Bah Ben, Pravin Sir, Shelter and others is something that I never expected.  The exposure to different areas has been unparalleled until now. The sudden meetings such as BIS at Marriott Shillong, UIDAI and Gov Connect at Tak Vivanta Ghy, the two big trip to Delhi+Ahmedabad and Hyderabad were highlights of SeMT life of last year. The flexibility given to me is also praiseworthy. I also enjoyed the interesting office works such as AUA/KUA, Tech Park, Submarine cable thing, HR policy, AI-CoE, ICCC inauguration, three days sessions at MATI, constant focus on data and CB by NeGD, initiative such as TAU and attendance, the SeMT interview and the subsequent efforts to bring Pranjal by hook or by crook. Things were really moving there. So much so that, when Mariama asked me to apply for the Dakar Digital Specialist position of the World Bank, I seriously thought it might go through as well. I even started preparing Nina mentally for a continent shift. But alas, the dominance of middle part of the year continued. 

Anyway, shifting to a new place and setting up home with wife and kids require huge huge efforts. You can't plan all the items, there will always be shortages. I feel lucky to get a nice rented house with a dance academy on the ground floor. However, fixing stuffs such as geyser, washing machine, dining table, bed, winter clothes - omg! My driving fear in hilly roads is going out slowly as I am getting used to the roads. The ending of the year was full with the euphoria of Cherry Blossom festival and Brayan Adams show as we hosted guests at our rented house.

4) First surgery - On health, like other years, I only had the teeth troubles including RCT of one teeth and the painful sleepless nights during IMC trip. But Dr. Sarin's book prompted me to revisit Deuta's death causes and undergo Fibroscan test. Thanks to the test and the Christmas break, I could plan the gallstone surgery nicely without any office stress. The details are written in a separate post. I feel good and more confident about my health now. Fear of hospitalization is less now.  

The IITG circle

5) PhD at IITG - Throughout the year, IIT has been the only place that kept my self confidence high. Getting allotment of the MSH (by hook or by crook) was an amazing news of the last year. IIT life has been eventful- dropping of HS558, the two economics seminars with Prof Das, typical middle class mistakes of not saving the new version of IITG assignment , not being able to Dr. Charan Gurumurthy ( Tata Electronics) during RIC, managing the regular classes by weekly visits to Ghy, preparing for exam by sending Rodali and Nina to Nichinta, the article ( made irrelevant by Modi's har ghar muft bijli yojna), getting selection of paper during RIC, policy presentation (still pending though), the linkedIN channel (still pending by Karuna Da),  the process of writing two papers for HS706, securing 9.5 CGPA, rejection from IIT Mumbai, formation of doctoral committee and then clearing the Comprehensive exam, the super exciting new knowledge gathering for ESS and many more. I tell Nina, if I were given Assam position, I would have commuted from IIT only. IITG is the new constant in my life and last year completely attached its identity with my life.

6) Seeing Rodali grow - We started the year with Rodali crawling and trying hard to walk. She can now run, scream, talk multiple words, imitate - oh, how lovely! Her food intake issue worried us a lot. The multiple doctor's visits didn't do anything, but time; she eats enough now. I still remember her first few words like 'idijaam', 'lite' etc. Ideally I should not complaint about joblessness at all as I see Rodali in all her moves. After shifting to Shillong, she slowly getting used to me going office, from crying she started waving. However, handling her without maid was a nightmare once we started Shillong chapter. Consoling frustrated Nina became one of my works post office. Things are just perfect with her now; I hope and pray this continues. 

HIGHs of the year -

1) Public talks - A record 13 programmes - I must say a great year on public lectures. 1 Feb- GB College Morigaon, 17 March- Agia xakha xahita sobha career counseling, 20 June - Vishnu Rabha diwas at Ghengamari, 26 June - district day prog ( I prepared for the well publicized event), 28 June - NPTI and Takshaahila civil service academy, 14 July- jogi xonmiloni guest at Budhipara, 10 Aug- paper at RIC, 30 Aug- seminar at Deen dayal college organized by social welfare department, 28-30 Oct - the three day sessions at MATI on emerging technologies, 22 Nov- Employment Office prog at Goalpara, 9 Dec - IIM Shillong LEAD conference, 17 Dec - Badungduppa panel discussion

2) Equity investment- Apart from being in IIT, equity investment gave me high in the jobless period. Started from 13L by March end, I am now targeting 20 L by this FY, 20K SIP is already achieved. I made big purchases in the tune of 50-60K in a single day on multiple occasions. I also tried understanding F&O with Tapan, but then government's cautionary regulations came for F&O.

3) Soulisunthar Khautardam: Bringing Nischal here in Rampur and subsequent endeavor that we are planning together now give me great hope for the future. I hope this foundation seeded in 2024 will go a long way.  

LOWs of the year -

1) The fiasco of double line and the way Nina managed alone without knowledge of any member - OMG. Still feel bit guilty of the incident, me slightly more than hers. But I think that was a correct decision.

2) Losing the Pancharatna land after putting so much of effort made me very sad. The whole chapter of Jogighopa logistic park came on halt post that debacle. On land front, Dibyo Sir's negative response on the approach road of Kalitapara land is another low point. The rejection of Basundhara applications citing Samaguri and Agia college lands as forest land dampen my spirit for real estate.

3) No enthusiastic engagement with the library or Xomidhan in the last year. I felt so bad in closing the xomidhan bank account, which I activated after so much of efforts. On library front as well, there has been draught throughout. 

4)  The failed attempts to change my SeMT state allocation from Meghalaya to Assam was indeed a low point of last year. It reminded me of failed attempts during Assam relocation in Sarba era. Even after so many years, I am so helpless, still. 

5) The unfulfilled desire to celebrate 40th birthday with a bang will hunt me always

6) Several low points that affected me - yet unsuccessful to keep my feet in UPSC coaching ecosystem- wrote the essay teaching lesson plan, went to AASC, not fruit. Assam Govt let me down - JJM complain without any fruit; pollution renewal after paying for wrong challan etc frustrated me.

People

1) I am super grateful to Jahid da, Karuna Da, Amit Jain -in that order.

2) Death- unfortunate death of Pranjal's cousin at Dhubri, suicide of Silpa's father, Anup gogoi sir,  Birubala Rabha.

3) Seems like cheated by Reeta baideu (the literary festival panel thing), Sunil Sir (later clarified), falling out with Kamal was a big disappointment.

4) New - Sam garvey, Pranjit (with shyamsundar), Nasen da's daughter, Bondita borbora, Hrishikesh Goswami, Sanjib Da, Anjali, Phule Khuri, Monica madam, Manas(gyanmalini), Pranjal (Priyanka), the whole Shillong circle

5) Reconnect- Antaripa, Deepjyoti-Aizawl, Narayan- Baguan, rupak, Himanta, Patgiri Sir, Suresh Peregu

Visits

Gelepu Visit

Ghy bookfare, Manas National park and the mouth burning incident, Aizawl trip, IITG guest house, Gelepu trip via pathetic roads, Delhi and Ahmedabad - first official trip amidst much uncertainty, which somehow I know how to handle now. Watching many big people from telecom industry with Modi, Sightseeing in Shillong such as Laitlum, Shillong peak, Dawki etc. The December trip to Hyderabad was memorable mainly because of my visit to Silpa Manor. So much has changed in Hyderabad- I think I am happy that I didn't continue there.

Nice diary pages

15 Jan (breaking middle class mentality), 9 Feb (last working day), 1Apr (Ghy vs other metro comparison), 26April (diff emotions of life), 6 May (feel good page), 2 July (A2O phase 2 immersion), 19 Sept ( first meeting with CM),  28 Nov day (Restless day)

Family

Dominated events of last year - Nina's decision to move to Performing Study subject for NET exam, Nina's first performance in Shillong amidst all the odds (i.e. handling Rodali alone); Maa's suffering from shoulder pain and our desperate attempts to cure, Maa getting the super annuity money, Maa's publication of her second book where MNM Trust is registered as a publisher in ISBN;  Dada's bank loan fiasco where he learnt a big lesson at a huge cost, my declining interest on Dada's affairs is something I have noticed in last year;  Junma's move into the adulthood; Moina's almost finalization of the flat at Ahomgaon; Richa's marriage; Maa-in law's acidity issue and visit to Hyderabad. 

Reading and Writing

Discovering Saurav Kumar Chaliha via Oxanto electron and Jyamiti,  A2O part 2 over on 17 March, started writing an article on happiness with the different perspectives that I learnt in this year mianly that of Jeffrey Sachs (not complete still). Psychology of Money was the most effective read ( analysis on page - 25 July), Another recommendation from Moina was 'own your body'- another masterpiece.  Read two books written by Hrishikesh Goswami- waste of time. In Assamese language, Bokul Fulor Dore was a masterpiece. Watched a movie Local Kungfu 3 after ages in movie hall with Himanta in Shillong. I was happy to complete the article for the souvenir of Badungduppa's 25 year celebration, particularly after saying no to Xahitya Xobha people on two occasions.

The portrait

Unique activities

Drawing room makeover with wooden frame, photo wall and most interestingly by Marshall Baruah's 20-day long painting. The 'under preparation' case of opening a policy school in IIT has been a good effort that needs a godfather. The height of frustration represented via the Krishnai moulabi baba episode - total waste of money, not much of time though. Fishing is a new area- searching for fish at the moonlight sky at Nichinta with Shankar da and Naba and completion of the PMMSY pond were two highlights. 

Some thoughts that emerged

out of all the reading and unique activities- I know now why poor people buy lottery ticket, and they are not stupid; Still I have the desire to become rich and possess materialistic pleasure - something that I fee while in Delhi, sometimes in Ghy as well. Genetics do play a crucial role in the wellbeing of any human being.

Big public event 

Return of Modi3.0, Microsoft's patch outage, TaTa semiconductor in Assam, Ouster of Sheikh Hasina, fall of Syria's president, Israel's attack on Hamas, Hezbollah etc , the construction of Agia- Ghy road and the pathetic driving experience, the rising cyber and trading frauds 

Thoughts for 2025

I believe I will be in Shillong only the whole next year unless something 'very big' happens. I just wish Nina clears the NET exam. If nothing happens, we will plan next child towards the end of 2025. An international trip is something we are thinking. I hope SOAS will happen successfully. 

First hospitalisation/surgery of this sapiens life

 Since I started thinking about health seriously, I had this mixed feeling of pride and fear about not being hospitalized even once in my 40-year old lifetime. Although there was a sense of confidence when I think about this, the portion of fear was growing with time. I wanted to taste hospitalization for some minor ailment. Should I say God has listened to me finally?

FibroScan Report

As written in my 'Turning 40' post, I did the Fibroscan in Guwahati just before leaving for Shillong. Although the status of the liver is 'as expected' with grade 2 fat, a calculus measuring 10 mm was noted in GB lumen. It was a surprise for me as I never experienced any pain in the stomach. At times, I do feel over filled-up even after small intake of food. Nevertheless, surgery was the only way out as the opening for GB is only 2 mm, am told. Shifting to Shillong was given more priority that time. I patiently waited for the Christmas vacation to get the operation done. The under the Saal tree theatre festival and Richa's marriage also coincided. I took a full weak leave from 16 Dec onwards. Before the Christmas holidays end on 1 Jan, 2025, I should be able to move around- that was the idea.

The selection of hospital and doctor took some time. Firstly, I rejected the choice of place as Guwahati mainly because of the support system and condition of Agia- Ghy road. Now, in Goalpara, there was no network hospital of Safeway TP (National Insurance), the Mediclaim TPA of DIC. I was prefering Nirmala due to proximity from home. In case of doctor, Mr. S.N. Sharma is a famous name. Al-Salam also has an expert doctor (Nina was also operated there) for Laparoscopy, but choice of date depends on the hospital. Money was not a constraint as I would get reimbursement. But I want a hospital who would support during the reimbursement process with signature and information. Feedback from doctor circle of Goalpara yields another name- Dr. Shahzad Ali Ahmed of the Solace Hospital. The accountant of Solace is an acquaintance of Deuta.  Finally, we zeroed down on Dr. Ahmed at Solace, with second preference being Dr. Sharma at Nirmala.

The GB- it's big!

The first interaction with Dr. Ahmed on 18 Dec went for 45 min; he was nice enough to explain me the whole process. We decided to get admitted next day and get the operation done.

On the operation day, Deuta took me to hospital empty stomach for sonography. Nina gave me rice in a tiffin to eat after sonography as surgery was due in the evening, before which Maa and Nina would join me in the hospital. After the completion of blood test, X-ray, ECG and Sonography, the doctor needed to take a decision as my BP was fluctuating 150-100 even after I consumed 40mg telma in the morning. The other reports were perfect, the calculus was measured 14.8 mm this time. Finally, the anesthesia doctor gave go ahead and I was admitted in a cabin. Dr. Ahmed told the surgery will be done sooner and no food should be eaten. The tiffin remained as it was packed. 

First time canula was fitted into my hand. Lying on the cabin bed is something I always avoided. The moment has come finally. The saline started. The ward boy came to shave my belly (with Nina's advice I already shaved my lower parts). Deuta told that something would be injected compelling me to go to the loo; it didn't come though. There was no painful or bad moments before I was taken to the OT.

I was taken to the OT at around 4-15 PM. After some time, the anesthesia doctor came and told that I would go to sleep now. I don't remember anything after that.

After an hour, I was brought out. I remember the doctor telling that surgery was done successfully. Then I was taken to recovery room via a stretcher. I saw Maa, Deuta-Maa (in law), Nina and Rodali on the way. I was happy. There was no pain, only discomfort in the belly.

Rodali has been so understanding with the 'hi'

The night was passed peacefully. I kept going to bathroom with my own. The only discomfort was to sleep on your back looking straight up. I tried doing left-right, the nurse came running. When the mouth got dry, the nurse used to give some water via cotton.

There were three other patients in the recovery room. None of them could move. I was feeling fortunate only. The nurse and ward boys kept having all personal conversation which was quite annoying. Solace was having some badminton competition among its staff members. So much excitement for that. The time went very slow though. I felt like the morning is a long long way.

The next morning I had to urinate so frequently that the nurses stopped the saline. One ward boy came to remove the pipe on the right side of the belly. Maa came to see me, she stayed the night in the cabin. Two decades ago, I was night attendant for her gallstone surgery. She is still strong enough to become my attendant. Dada, Mintu da, Deuta and finally Nina came with Rodali.

The doctor came and asked whether I want to get discharged. My BP and body temperature were under control and there was no worry. Dr. Ahmed has been super cool; he just doesn't want to keep the patient even an hour longer. I liked the man. 

Nina transferred me to the cabin and started completing all the formalities such as medication, discharge letter, payment etc. She was superb in completing all activities by herself. Between, Rahul bhini, Ity Da and Maa(in law) came and sat in the cabin. 

Nina drove me home alone. This is the kind of ideal independent wife I always wanted. Happy me! The hospital bill came 30K only, after the accountant gave discount of 7K. The medicine and test etc to be calculated separately. My next visit is fixed after ten days to cut the 'silai'.

 The next day Nina showed me the gallstone. It is solid hard as shown above. I really can't understand how this gets formed and how I was surviving with this. I sincerely thank God for getting my first surgery done without any hiccup (until now).

At home, food diets are restricted. In the first two days, I get the discomfort as certain postures initiates a 'haan mari dhora' pain, seems like a certain vessel gets stretched in a painful way. Deven moha also confirmed the same feeling post his surgery. Slowly I recovered from that. Now, the only discomfort is while sleeping. I went to loo after 3 days alone and took bath after 2 days with help from Nina.

Dressing done by Nina after 5 days

This is how it looks

My first experience of getting hospitalized or doing a surgery has been good so far. I am thankful to God, the doctor, family members mainly Nina and Maa and my office people for granting me the time period. I can also appreciate how childbirth gives pain to the health all mothers in the world. Now, I am less afraid to face another hospitalization. 

But, I wish that day will never come in my life time. 

The suspected but unwanted and unexpected career shift to Shillong

I need to change the password of some of my accounts as it says 'N0jobperiod!' The 7-month long draught is going end very soon.

What went wrong:

Jahid da warned me that many people are trying for Assam allocation after getting selected as Head-SeMT. He only knows four people - Pallab, Pujari, Subhra, Mishra, in addition to myself. I didn't budge much since Sunil Sir, the HR director of the recruitment process, informed me that I topped the interview panel. State selection is not an issue, but the salary cap is. However, I underestimated the 'desire and ability of influencing government employees'. Particularly, of someone who sits at NeGD and meets the recruiters morning to evening. Was there anything I could have done differently, but did not do for sheer overconfidence or negligence? I texted Sunil Sir thrice to enquire whether state allocation is on track; he didn't bother to respond. I did talk with Vinay Sir, who told me about his inability to foretell my state allocation prior. I tried via Ajeet, Amit etc, but they can't get actual information. What I could have done is contacting CEO, Secy or Mantri much prior, apprehending something 'wrong' would occur! But, I think, this is insane, when the HR director only told you that you had topped the panel.

Efforts made by me post email:

I called and texted Sunil Sir multiple times just to get the response that nothing could be done immediately. Had a discussion with Vinay Sir, who told how NeGD resource might have influenced and it is too late now. Satyakam talked to his friend who is OSD to Ashwini Vaishnav. That person talked with P&CEO of NeGD, just to get a generalized response that there are many such queries that would be dealt later together. Contacted Kamakhya Tasa via Lakheswar, but of no help. I made a call to Reeta baideu whether she has any contact with IT minister, answer was in negative. Rajib Da tried via RSS, but of no help. Bhaiti da texted to HBS, I also sent personal message to HBS- no response. Shiladitya ji made tall promises, but all proved futile.

Why I accepted:

Finally I accepted the offer. Replying on top of the email that I sent asking for relocation, I informed about my willingness to join Meghalaya SeMT on 5 Sept. I didn't even look at the salary breakup, forget negotiation, which is less than my last employer. Poor Manjit, I don't have any other choice. I have been without job since 9 February'24. My PhD coursework and even comprehensive exam is also done. There is no excuse to remain jobless from PhD perspective now. Although I was searching employment in Assam, I didn't have any choice from outside also (ref- rejection by Microsoft public policy role). Delhi- I would be able to manage at DIC or NSDC, but I have least interest to go back to these two org. If I have to go back to Delhi it has to be a BIG opportunity with very good remuneration. The non availability of any option has pressed me against time. The social and financial pressure are also huge. On the positive side, Shillong is only 2.5 hour from Ghy. Nina is hopeful about continuing her school. If I get Married Hostel allocation at IIT, that would be a Ghy base for me as well. The climate of Shillong is better, although an expensive city than Guwahati. Nina was happy that NeGD didn't give me my third choice i.e. Lakhwadeep. 

Thoughts on future:

To be honest, I am fully immersed in destroying my future plan as a resident of Guwahati. This painful activity is not allowing me to see any bright side of Meghalaya shifting. I only see the high rental and living cost of Shillong, DIC's policy for not providing hotel stay or relocation bonus, absence of any good social circle at Shillong, how I would be worse off financially there, possible impact on Nina's school and on my relationship with IIT Guwahati, restriction on Rodalee's movement, issues with parking and possession of own vehicle etc. I am totally clueless what's next for my career. Maybe Nina would bring some change someday if she is able to clear the NET exam in the future. 

Conclusion:

Thus my longest homestay post metric is coming to an end. Maybe a separate post would be needed to analyse what I got and what not. Feeling as of now can be summarized by 'something is better than nothing', no more, no less. 

Turning 40

This should have been a public post with lot of insights. Spending 40 years on earth with lot of analysis on my own life, this is expected out of me to produce a masterpiece on this important day. But I couldn't do it. Somehow the darkness of the professional career has overpowered all other emotions. However, taking the life as a whole, you may call this as my immaturity also.

I also thought of hosting a birthday party at home inviting the friends who played an important part during my school days at Agia. I even listed the persons to send invitation. But I have no satisfactory answer to the question "what are you doing these days?", and I cancelled the plan.

The day was spent well. Nina brought a cake and a flower bouquet (from Bongaigaon) , cooked payax, Maa gave thogi. We are also planning to go out in the afternoon. I am planning to do the monthly kharcha at night. (now 4-20 PM)

One new thing I started- made a folder called Birthdays where I will try putting all the available birthday photos. 'Just feel like' kind of activities. I have recently made two folders of photos- social occasion and Zing travel express. 

I was reading through birthday post of 2 years back. Of all the things I planned doing before turning 40, I have not accomplished a single one, except becoming a father. Shame! Shame! 

I am going to take Health seriously from now on. As a first step, I will do Liver Fibroscan since I was diagonized with fatty lever 5 years ago. I am reading ' Own your Body' by Dr. Shiv Sarin and would search a few more books on health and wellness. Health (including happiness) and Finance are two topics I would spend most of my time onwards. 

My current status is not so good from a job/salary perspective. There has not been good news at all. I got a rejection from IIT Mumbai public policy conference which shocked Karuna Da more than me. The ardent delay on the appointments are causing much agony. I am not happily applying for SeMT job, rather under compulsion to stay in Assam for wife, childcare and PhD education. That compromise on the 'linear' career progression decisions are made worst by the uncertainty of chief strategist role, delay of SeMT and rejection for Microsoft roles. I am not sure what the 'good days' that astrologer keeps talking about my present. This is not good, nobody will term this as good situation to be in for a person of my background. On top of everything, the way Dharmapatni is stuck in whatever she does, is making the whole situation really grave. 

Let me end the post with positive note. Let happy days come post by 40th birthday. My Rahu-Jupitaar dasha is ending on 4 Aug and Rahu-Saturn will start. Since there is nothing exciting to look for the days ahead, at least the astrology is something at hand to bring a smile. 

I wish, all the 'reasonable' people of the world has good health and wealth. Aamin!!