Guwahati Fiasco - why it hurted most ?

I did not want to write this blog post. But Dada was repeatedly asking writing down all the points as I might forget later. Also, before writing my '2017 analysis' blog, I wanted to completely close this chapter.
This was a perfect case of political victimization, how narratives can change impression and demolish an image, how one person can go on complete back foot on an incidence and how one can helplessly watch the destruction of his own dreams.

Look at the files in my laptop folder

I was hurt because I got involved emotionally. Just have a look at the files of my Guwahati fiasco folder- I wrote an announcement blogpost (still to publish), farewell email, appeared for exit interview, wrote to Sarbananda, sold out my household items, gave farewell gifts, paid advanced rent to apartments at Guwahati- oh my God! Also, starting from April until October- this long time was spent in dreaming about Guwahati. To be honest, I am still recovering from that shock. My rented house still does not have any furniture. NeGD people still ask me when I am leaving etc etc.


The decision to write letter to CM was impulsive. I wrote the letter within 3 hours of receiving rejection from Flipkart. After a month's silence on revising my salary, I thought I have to escalate this to get a justification of the insult initiated by Puzari and his two SeMT members. The involvement of K Tasa was only by chance as the proposed meeting with CM got postponed and I had to rush to office keeping the letter with him. However I didn't expect this letter would give the most accurate tool to my opponents.

I knew about the changed mindset of Kuldip Gayan after I informed him about the CM letter. In fact, he was quite fine with this unless he came to know the involvement of K Tasa to place the letter in CM's table (however, I am still unsure whether that letter was seen by CM, as Gayan may have removed this from table).  However, I failed to guess the intensity of Gayan's reaction. My email conversations with Solanki were quite positive and he was one of the prime reasons why I decided to join on Oct 4th in spite of any formal appointment letter (For God's sake- I am still unable to find out why the yahoo emails wrote by Solaki to me are deleted from my Inbox). I was expecting some uncomfortable moments in the initial days after talking with Jahid Da; still I decided to byte the bullet.

On 3rd October, I showed 'One Last Question' to all my office people. There was exchange of emotional dialogues etc. Then CEO called to discuss something about GCCS speakers along with Manas Makani. After the discussion, I informed him today was my last day.

CEO was under the impression that I would leave post GCCS. He wanted me to handle the speakers until the end; soon he started to get into details. He called up Mr. Lohia, principal Secy to CM of Assam requesting him to keep me in NeGD until end of GCCS. Lohia took some time to get back after discussing with Solanki. And, here comes the bomb!

I was sitting in CEO's room only. Lohia told I am a political guy and they decided (yes, I heard it correct, already decided) not to take me. I complained to CM alleging corruption, involved MP to push my case etc etc. CEO was stunned and gave me the look 'WTF' !

CEO told he will call up all concerned people and I came out of his office. I called up Gayan; I just can't forget the happiness in his voice when I told him about Lohia's words. In next 2 hours (when I re-entered CEO's office) I had to cut farewell cake, take a decision on my evening flight, request someone (finally got Trishna) to collect my luggage from GATI office and above all, calm down myself.

CEO called me after 2 hours. It seemed he spent around an hour calling Lohia, Solanki, Gayan and the IT Secy of Assam. What he told (in front of a group of other NeGD employees, as usual) can be summarized in four points:
1) It seems I violated all rules of civil society by writing a letter to CM. The narrative in Guwahati was that I complained to CM alleging bribery etc. I could have talked to other higher officials (will OSD listen to anybody?) , but directly going to CM was the biggest crime I did (Isn't he representative of Assamese people?)
2) I am political and tried to influence by involving MP; hence, going forward MPs will get involved in day to day issues. This single point was sufficient to influence bureaucrats like Solanki and Lohia. How a simple call from K Tasa to Solanki where I was referred for mere 30 seconds changed the perception against me?
3) I am going to oust the close people of CM like OSD and Secys and this is my game plan. I conveyed my plan to one Social Media expert in a recent meeting in Delhi and that faithful guy has informed the OSD. If this is correct (and I have no reasons to doubt), I can only imagine how much black sheep the Himalay guy is!
4) I was not issued any formal appointment letter. So, it was more like I was imposing myself on the innocent people of Assam secretariat.

I became speechless, but didn't cry. CEO too started doubting my character (although he convinced later during my work in GCCS). As an immediate step, CEO made Vinay Sir sent a letter to AMTRON requesting to delay my joining. I came home, exhausted, tired and with no place to sleep in the empty house.

The Box that was taken back from mid way

In the subsequent days, I got totally busy into GCCS stuffs. After CEO came to know about my issues for the delayed appraisal, he expedited the process and gave good hikes. I withdrew resignation to become eligible for the salary hike. NeGD people kept blaming CEO for stopping me (even Secretary telecom heard about this) and he kept boasting for saving me. Dada had to change the rented house as the previous one was expensive. I deleted phone numbers of all Assam Secretariat people concerned. On the first day of GCCS, AMTRON sent me withdrawal of offer email. Eventually, the narrative becomes- 'we sincerely wanted Manjit to join, but he delayed and we can't keep waiting for a crucial project like MyGov Assam'.

I thought of doing multiple things (for revenge/as a reaction), but have not done anything yet. There are multiple reasons. In this whole saga, I have been on complete back foot. 4-5 responsible government officials are talking against me; who am I to convince? Also, they created the narratives based on a fact such as 'letter to CM', 'Kamakhya Tasa's call', 'salary issues' etc. A fact can't make a story, it is the narratives. And, narratives are created by people with his or her perceptions. And, this time I could not create that narrative.Hence, there is chance that any step taken by me might backfire.


Many say everything happens for a reason, destiny has something better stored for me etc. Until today, I have  no reason to believe these lines.

Moina's marriage, progress of my non-profits etc

Moina is turning 29 after a week. From various angles, it has become kind of imperative that she gets married at the earliest. Above all, she is not that kind of 'super aspiration & independent' type of girl who would let go this marriage pressure becoming heavy on herself. In fact, she has also initiated talks and told me about her desire to get married soon, in addition to the continuous followup from Maa.

With Moina at Lonavala

Moina's relationship with Tapan (Pathak) that started long back in B. Barooah College has probably done more good to her than bad until now. She has faced some of the worst days in her academic life and as a family who loves good marks, we have not been able to do full justice to her situation, I believe. What I may have wanted is somewhat better family condition so that Tapan can explore opportunities rather than thinking about the bread-and-butter of his family members. His entrepreneurship efforts are praiseworthy; even after multiple failures, he has not given up. This quality may further be extrapolated in coming years when the circles of me and Dada will add to his venture. The fact that he has registered his company now, the future should be more entrepreneurial. Hence, overall I am optimistic.

Efforts are on to initiate conversation with Tapan's family. In Moina's upcoming visit in January, we are trying take the first step. I want the marriage to happen in 2018 itself. But we need to see how that plans out. The next obvious step would be my marriage. For last couple of months, I am convinced that marriage should be the next step. I am not doing anything extra-ordinary that requires me to remain single. And, I am almost crossing the average marriage age for 'my type' of people.

Dada is quite stable now with two children. I just hope he gets the promotion as Assistant Manager next year and Bou gets a job (preferably the high school TET). Bou's potential job will bring them closer to Agia, which will be good for Maa's old age. After the teacher's award, Maa is enthusiastic for one year extension of service. On home front, things are quite OK at this point of time.

My non-profit involvements:
Xomidhan has become an integral component of my intangibles. Sometime, I really feel proud of this initiative. We are also generating money these days from the collaboration with The Assam Tribune (Rs 600/- per publication), which is a good sign from the sustainability point of view. Induction of Nabanita, Bidyut Da, Manjil has really fuelled up the energy of the core team. Pranjal has become a strong base. In fact, we have not suffered much after the departure of Satyakam and Buljit Da, which was a big worry for me that time. I really enjoyed the Whatsapp live session and the FB live interview very recently on the backdrop of GCCS 2017.

BD learning cycling

Attention is needed on the home library. My dream is to create a huge library in next 10-15 years. I have realized the old vision of 'creating interest for reading' does not make much sense in a place like Agia at this point of time. To grab attention, the magnificent and the sheer number of books maybe an attractive parameter. Recently Sunil Sharma Sir donated quite a few books for the library.  The prize distribution ceremony of the year 2017 hasn't happened yet and that makes me sad (also renewal of Xomidhan registration).


Apart from the two, I have very limited involvement in non-profit activities. In AKB Facebook group I am still a moderator, but not contributing anything in Xahitya upload. In Purbanchal also, I am not giving any attention, except attending 1-2 meetings. However, my contribution continues for Quizens, Joy Da or Sukrya Da's initiatives and anyone who sought my advice.

I enjoyed writing this blog; it is showing my focus on intangibles. I will continue doing this in the days to come.

A label called Career - why did I miss this?

People say sitting on toilet komod, one can get innovative ideas. I got two today- 1. start working on developing a public policy module to request universities/institutions to admit me as visiting faculty, 2. why there is no label titled 'Career' in my autobiography blog?

There maybe one explanation for the latter- I haven't made any distinction between my personal and professional goals while thinking about the future. Although this two are interlinked, I can see most of my posts under labels such as TimeStamp, Event, Decision, Conversation are related to career. Fuck ! This certainly means I am giving way too much time for the thoughts related to my career bit. This also means I am putting other things such as Xomidhan, book writing, exploring new thoughts in the back burner or I am not writing about them at all, although they represent a huge part of my life, things that I love doing.

This is actually a good realization. From another perspective, labels such as Timestamp/Event are not going to give much input while drafting a final autobiography in later stage of my life.

So, here comes the decision: I am going to make two new labels today - Career and Intangibles. Let me define the two below:
Career: Only those posts related to my thoughts (future or past) for a professional career (i.e. that pays me money). If any career related post falls in the Conversation or Decision category, those two will get priority.
Intangibles: This will feature those posts related to the intangibles of human life such as volunteering, hobby, passion, travel, doing hatke things etc.Mostly those things that I planned to include in the 'measurable parameters of intangibles' after conversation with Alex.  Relationships may also fall in this category unless I don't make a separate category called 'Relationship' (I have plans though).

Introduction of the two labels today resulted in removing two labels namely 'Conversation' & 'Timestamp', along-with lot of reshuffle of posts.