Guwahati Fiasco - why it hurted most ?

I did not want to write this blog post. But Dada was repeatedly asking writing down all the points as I might forget later. Also, before writing my '2017 analysis' blog, I wanted to completely close this chapter.
This was a perfect case of political victimization, how narratives can change impression and demolish an image, how one person can go on complete back foot on an incidence and how one can helplessly watch the destruction of his own dreams.

Look at the files in my laptop folder

I was hurt because I got involved emotionally. Just have a look at the files of my Guwahati fiasco folder- I wrote an announcement blogpost (still to publish), farewell email, appeared for exit interview, wrote to Sarbananda, sold out my household items, gave farewell gifts, paid advanced rent to apartments at Guwahati- oh my God! Also, starting from April until October- this long time was spent in dreaming about Guwahati. To be honest, I am still recovering from that shock. My rented house still does not have any furniture. NeGD people still ask me when I am leaving etc etc.


The decision to write letter to CM was impulsive. I wrote the letter within 3 hours of receiving rejection from Flipkart. After a month's silence on revising my salary, I thought I have to escalate this to get a justification of the insult initiated by Puzari and his two SeMT members. The involvement of K Tasa was only by chance as the proposed meeting with CM got postponed and I had to rush to office keeping the letter with him. However I didn't expect this letter would give the most accurate tool to my opponents.

I knew about the changed mindset of Kuldip Gayan after I informed him about the CM letter. In fact, he was quite fine with this unless he came to know the involvement of K Tasa to place the letter in CM's table (however, I am still unsure whether that letter was seen by CM, as Gayan may have removed this from table).  However, I failed to guess the intensity of Gayan's reaction. My email conversations with Solanki were quite positive and he was one of the prime reasons why I decided to join on Oct 4th in spite of any formal appointment letter (For God's sake- I am still unable to find out why the yahoo emails wrote by Solaki to me are deleted from my Inbox). I was expecting some uncomfortable moments in the initial days after talking with Jahid Da; still I decided to byte the bullet.

On 3rd October, I showed 'One Last Question' to all my office people. There was exchange of emotional dialogues etc. Then CEO called to discuss something about GCCS speakers along with Manas Makani. After the discussion, I informed him today was my last day.

CEO was under the impression that I would leave post GCCS. He wanted me to handle the speakers until the end; soon he started to get into details. He called up Mr. Lohia, principal Secy to CM of Assam requesting him to keep me in NeGD until end of GCCS. Lohia took some time to get back after discussing with Solanki. And, here comes the bomb!

I was sitting in CEO's room only. Lohia told I am a political guy and they decided (yes, I heard it correct, already decided) not to take me. I complained to CM alleging corruption, involved MP to push my case etc etc. CEO was stunned and gave me the look 'WTF' !

CEO told he will call up all concerned people and I came out of his office. I called up Gayan; I just can't forget the happiness in his voice when I told him about Lohia's words. In next 2 hours (when I re-entered CEO's office) I had to cut farewell cake, take a decision on my evening flight, request someone (finally got Trishna) to collect my luggage from GATI office and above all, calm down myself.

CEO called me after 2 hours. It seemed he spent around an hour calling Lohia, Solanki, Gayan and the IT Secy of Assam. What he told (in front of a group of other NeGD employees, as usual) can be summarized in four points:
1) It seems I violated all rules of civil society by writing a letter to CM. The narrative in Guwahati was that I complained to CM alleging bribery etc. I could have talked to other higher officials (will OSD listen to anybody?) , but directly going to CM was the biggest crime I did (Isn't he representative of Assamese people?)
2) I am political and tried to influence by involving MP; hence, going forward MPs will get involved in day to day issues. This single point was sufficient to influence bureaucrats like Solanki and Lohia. How a simple call from K Tasa to Solanki where I was referred for mere 30 seconds changed the perception against me?
3) I am going to oust the close people of CM like OSD and Secys and this is my game plan. I conveyed my plan to one Social Media expert in a recent meeting in Delhi and that faithful guy has informed the OSD. If this is correct (and I have no reasons to doubt), I can only imagine how much black sheep the Himalay guy is!
4) I was not issued any formal appointment letter. So, it was more like I was imposing myself on the innocent people of Assam secretariat.

I became speechless, but didn't cry. CEO too started doubting my character (although he convinced later during my work in GCCS). As an immediate step, CEO made Vinay Sir sent a letter to AMTRON requesting to delay my joining. I came home, exhausted, tired and with no place to sleep in the empty house.

The Box that was taken back from mid way

In the subsequent days, I got totally busy into GCCS stuffs. After CEO came to know about my issues for the delayed appraisal, he expedited the process and gave good hikes. I withdrew resignation to become eligible for the salary hike. NeGD people kept blaming CEO for stopping me (even Secretary telecom heard about this) and he kept boasting for saving me. Dada had to change the rented house as the previous one was expensive. I deleted phone numbers of all Assam Secretariat people concerned. On the first day of GCCS, AMTRON sent me withdrawal of offer email. Eventually, the narrative becomes- 'we sincerely wanted Manjit to join, but he delayed and we can't keep waiting for a crucial project like MyGov Assam'.

I thought of doing multiple things (for revenge/as a reaction), but have not done anything yet. There are multiple reasons. In this whole saga, I have been on complete back foot. 4-5 responsible government officials are talking against me; who am I to convince? Also, they created the narratives based on a fact such as 'letter to CM', 'Kamakhya Tasa's call', 'salary issues' etc. A fact can't make a story, it is the narratives. And, narratives are created by people with his or her perceptions. And, this time I could not create that narrative.Hence, there is chance that any step taken by me might backfire.


Many say everything happens for a reason, destiny has something better stored for me etc. Until today, I have  no reason to believe these lines.

Moina's marriage, progress of my non-profits etc

Moina is turning 29 after a week. From various angles, it has become kind of imperative that she gets married at the earliest. Above all, she is not that kind of 'super aspiration & independent' type of girl who would let go this marriage pressure becoming heavy on herself. In fact, she has also initiated talks and told me about her desire to get married soon, in addition to the continuous followup from Maa.

With Moina at Lonavala

Moina's relationship with Tapan (Pathak) that started long back in B. Barooah College has probably done more good to her than bad until now. She has faced some of the worst days in her academic life and as a family who loves good marks, we have not been able to do full justice to her situation, I believe. What I may have wanted is somewhat better family condition so that Tapan can explore opportunities rather than thinking about the bread-and-butter of his family members. His entrepreneurship efforts are praiseworthy; even after multiple failures, he has not given up. This quality may further be extrapolated in coming years when the circles of me and Dada will add to his venture. The fact that he has registered his company now, the future should be more entrepreneurial. Hence, overall I am optimistic.

Efforts are on to initiate conversation with Tapan's family. In Moina's upcoming visit in January, we are trying take the first step. I want the marriage to happen in 2018 itself. But we need to see how that plans out. The next obvious step would be my marriage. For last couple of months, I am convinced that marriage should be the next step. I am not doing anything extra-ordinary that requires me to remain single. And, I am almost crossing the average marriage age for 'my type' of people.

Dada is quite stable now with two children. I just hope he gets the promotion as Assistant Manager next year and Bou gets a job (preferably the high school TET). Bou's potential job will bring them closer to Agia, which will be good for Maa's old age. After the teacher's award, Maa is enthusiastic for one year extension of service. On home front, things are quite OK at this point of time.

My non-profit involvements:
Xomidhan has become an integral component of my intangibles. Sometime, I really feel proud of this initiative. We are also generating money these days from the collaboration with The Assam Tribune (Rs 600/- per publication), which is a good sign from the sustainability point of view. Induction of Nabanita, Bidyut Da, Manjil has really fuelled up the energy of the core team. Pranjal has become a strong base. In fact, we have not suffered much after the departure of Satyakam and Buljit Da, which was a big worry for me that time. I really enjoyed the Whatsapp live session and the FB live interview very recently on the backdrop of GCCS 2017.

BD learning cycling

Attention is needed on the home library. My dream is to create a huge library in next 10-15 years. I have realized the old vision of 'creating interest for reading' does not make much sense in a place like Agia at this point of time. To grab attention, the magnificent and the sheer number of books maybe an attractive parameter. Recently Sunil Sharma Sir donated quite a few books for the library.  The prize distribution ceremony of the year 2017 hasn't happened yet and that makes me sad (also renewal of Xomidhan registration).


Apart from the two, I have very limited involvement in non-profit activities. In AKB Facebook group I am still a moderator, but not contributing anything in Xahitya upload. In Purbanchal also, I am not giving any attention, except attending 1-2 meetings. However, my contribution continues for Quizens, Joy Da or Sukrya Da's initiatives and anyone who sought my advice.

I enjoyed writing this blog; it is showing my focus on intangibles. I will continue doing this in the days to come.

A label called Career - why did I miss this?

People say sitting on toilet komod, one can get innovative ideas. I got two today- 1. start working on developing a public policy module to request universities/institutions to admit me as visiting faculty, 2. why there is no label titled 'Career' in my autobiography blog?

There maybe one explanation for the latter- I haven't made any distinction between my personal and professional goals while thinking about the future. Although this two are interlinked, I can see most of my posts under labels such as TimeStamp, Event, Decision, Conversation are related to career. Fuck ! This certainly means I am giving way too much time for the thoughts related to my career bit. This also means I am putting other things such as Xomidhan, book writing, exploring new thoughts in the back burner or I am not writing about them at all, although they represent a huge part of my life, things that I love doing.

This is actually a good realization. From another perspective, labels such as Timestamp/Event are not going to give much input while drafting a final autobiography in later stage of my life.

So, here comes the decision: I am going to make two new labels today - Career and Intangibles. Let me define the two below:
Career: Only those posts related to my thoughts (future or past) for a professional career (i.e. that pays me money). If any career related post falls in the Conversation or Decision category, those two will get priority.
Intangibles: This will feature those posts related to the intangibles of human life such as volunteering, hobby, passion, travel, doing hatke things etc.Mostly those things that I planned to include in the 'measurable parameters of intangibles' after conversation with Alex.  Relationships may also fall in this category unless I don't make a separate category called 'Relationship' (I have plans though).

Introduction of the two labels today resulted in removing two labels namely 'Conversation' & 'Timestamp', along-with lot of reshuffle of posts.

Health issues- teeth, piles, fever !

There has been super bad days since the Solar Eclipse i.e. 21st August (when Flipkart said no, the last post in this blog as well). Not only my professional life, even health has been a major impediment.

First, I had loose motion and fever just before traveling to Lonavala. I still remember the trembling I had on the night before travel. Lot of carefulness went into the trip. As a result, in spite of some tough exercise such as victory on Sinhagad Fort, my health didn't deteriorate. However, I came back with an unknown lump in my ass hole.

Embarrassing Photo of the lump

Piles- I only heard about this disease, but had no clue. I was scared like anything. I was unable to sit properly; while in loo, the situation was uncomfortable too (not painful though). I started researching and came to know piles is yet another lifestyle disease and 80-90% people these days have piles because of lifestyle issues. It was like a great discovery. I thought of visiting doctor, but the internet gyan focused on eating more of fibre food. I started having apple, broccoli etc regularly.  Within a week, the lump became very small and at present, there is almost nothing. I never felt the pain in the whole process. I wish it never comes back in future, but that possibility is less. So, here comes one more lifestyle disease added to my life.

In the next Saturay, when I was carrying the dining table from Kailash's place to my home, I sweated like anything. In the process of lifting the six chairs and the table from ground to the second floor, maybe I reached the exhaustion limit. I fell sick from that evening again- cold and fever. Luckily, there was a Sunday in between.

Before extraction

In the middle of next week, when I was still recovering from fever, the half broken crown of the tooth (remember it happened while I was in Aizawl; after Oxford, I and Arup once went to Goalpara Civil Hospital to extract that half broken tooth) bade goodbye to me. However, the portion inside root ('alu') was still attached.and a small portion was linking the broken crown to the inside-root portion. I went to Dentist, who suggested complete removal of the tooth is urgent need of the hour.

After extraction

After much deliberation, research and consultation with my mind and a few others, I decided to extract the tooth finally on Monday. Since, bad days are continuing, I must address all the 'bad' elements (Law of secret) that will come alongside. I prepared my mind and arrange the logistics in the weekend for the Monday extravaganza. Trishna was called in to boost the morale.

On  6th Nov, Monday, the expected event happened which I delayed by more than 4-5 years. The pain was less than I expected. The injection, the icing after extraction and the medication helped in speedy recovery. Although the crown of the tooth was weak, the portion inside root was very strong and it took the Dentist around 12 minutes (with a break) to extract the whole tooth after breaking it into three components. I took medication for 2 days and things look alright now. The next step (after 2-3 month) will be to put a bridge on that teeth, which will cost no less than INR 9000/-. The extraction cost was INR 1000/- and visiting fee was INR 200/-.

My overall condition at Dentist's chamber

Three day ago, Trishna fell sick terribly. I got an early morning call, went to her hostel at 5-00 AM. Then took her to Moolchand Hospital and tested for Dengue. Since, I had unavoidable situation at office, I requested Bruhid to come over and stay with her at my place. Hope things will be alright with her in next 2-3 days.

In the middle of all these, I couldn't apply for the ARIAS job in Guwahati. I was not much interested either.

I have 2-3 incomplete blog posts regarding the Guwahati fiasco. Have not been able to manage time to publish in current 10 AM to 10 PM schedule everyday. Settling my life in Delhi after everything pack-up stage has made me weal mentally. I feel like being defeated in a big war.



NB: I have borrowed that Solar Eclipse anecdote from the great astrologer, Mr Dibakar Nath, IAS.

The Flipkart Story - the most unfortunate one in the most critical time

In my last post, I mentioned about Flipkart. I had a scheduled 'conversation' on 1st August, which eventually postponed and the new slot was- 7th August 6-00 PM onwards. I decided to take the hangout from office since 7th Aug was raksha bandhan and most employees were on leave, including my managers. I finalized Sunil Sir's cabin after testing hangout with Taslima and Moina.

I didn't prepare much on that day, rather didn't get the opportunity to prepare. Whole day I was doing some stupid work of printing out letters (which I already did on Saturday as well for four hours); I was angry, headache was just about to start. Overall, a pathetic condition to attend any interview. Took a nap at Sunil Sir's cabin for around 20 minutes and after that I started feeling better at around 5-00 PM.

Sachin came online at 6:03 PM. No other person was with him; also he was attending from a cubical type setup as I saw some people walking behind him. He explained he would divide the conversation into three parts- what I do as consultant, then he would have some questions and at last I can ask questions.

Sachin Bansal, the poster boy of Indian startups was in my front. I was humbled and excited. I did not let go the opportunity of voicing out that excitement. After his first question, I told, "before I answer your question, I want to say a few lines. For last 5-6 years I always heard your name as an inspiring figure of India. I am so excited today and its a privilege to talk with you". I didn't observe whether that has any affect- he laughed. But I genuinely wanted to appreciate him without expecting anything.

I answered the first question as I prepared. I ended by saying I have sent his name as speaker for GCCS, however did not mention the fact that Flipkart can be a sponsor for GCCS. To be frank, I did not think he found my current work impressive.

If I remember correctly, the second question was on any example of project where there were multiple challenges and I found my way out. I didn't think of preparing for such questions. I started explaining the university workshop projects. Lot of stakeholder, no policy, multiple ministry etc. I could have been more focused in the answer. My answer didn't impress him much, I felt.

His next question was based on a previous point I made on influence/compulsion of 'power centre' in the government sector. He asked me to give examples (without mentioning names) where you are forced to act under compulsion- how you overcome etc. I told him how verbal recommendations come while selecting agencies, how clauses are modified to prefer specific companies etc. But I supplemented the answer by telling there are enough checks and balances in government (executive, legislature, RTI, e-office, CAG) and it is not easy to influence if someone does not want to get influenced. From this answer on-wards, I think he became bit positive.

The next question was one my career choice. Am I not with private sector (like Microsoft) and with government by choice? How has been my career decisions, etc? I prepared for this partially. I started with Agia, entered into Engineering because of Indian middle class, left Microsoft because I realized I was good at other things, worked with Govt of Mizoram (should not have mentioned, anyway), Oxford, McKinsey, unsuccessful attempt in politics and now want to shift for two reasons - limitation of a government servant and I have many ideas how Pvt sector can play a role with government.

Sachin told that my last answer give him leads for his next question- what do you think the role private sector can play...they cant listen to everything Govt asks etc. I kind of prepared this answer slightly differently. For a startup like Fipkart which wants to be world's largest internet company, Government must be a partner. I brought nationalism, Make in India project, how to build relationship like the Big 4 has developed etc. 

He again asked, suppose Flipkart is launching a food delivery chain- how should they reach out to govt? I should given more methodical answer, by I didn't. I played it down- Government is very open, a piece of paper and the government relation guy can simply walk into. Ultimately, the private company should create value. I think he bought my answer in this case.

Then he tried to remember any questions for about half a minute. He did not find any and asked me to ask question. I asked the one I thought - whether Flipkart founders dream to create a world class company, because the media is obsessed with salary, investment and discounts.

Sachin answered positively as expected. He again asked me for questions. In fact, he expected more. And, somehow nothing came to my mind. I again did wrong. I should have asked, as I did have many questions. I somehow told- I don't have question that time.

It was 6-30 PM that moment. He thanked, I thanked, he told - it was useful, very good, someone from Flikart will get back etc.  Then I hanged the hangout.

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Romy did get back a day later !

My second conversation was scheduled with Mr Sanjiv Saddy, Senior Vice President and Head of Corporate Affairs in Flipkat. I told Romy that I would be happy to travel to Gurugram for a face to face meeting and the sooner is better. She gave a time window 4 hours after our telephonic chat; however, finally we decided on 11 August, 10-00 AM at the Jabong office in Gurugram. In those two days between our conversation and actual interview, one big event happened- Flipkart raised $2.5 Billion from Softbank’s Startup vision fund. 

Kailash explained me the location and I decided to travel via Metro. I reached the office at 9-30 AM after starting at 8-15 AM from home. I texted Sanjiv at 9-54 AM and then he rang directing me the exact meeting room named Prada. While I reached the meeting room being escorted by the security guard, he was sitting and waiting for me. Sanjiv would be around 50 years old. I was also wearing only formal pant and shirt, no suit-tie. The reason- my suit is at Agia and traveling via metro/auto with suit-tie is not at all comfortable. Also, I thought this would be more of a conversation that an interview. 

Sanjiv began by asking whether I found difficulty in locating the office. I answered in negative; the metro and autowala took great care of me. I tried to observe how he digests the fact that I came via auto and metro; didn’t make out much from his emotion. He asked for tea/coffee, and I opted for green tea. I had no idea what interview etiquettes say on beverage offering; but I was thirsty. 

Then he brought my resume to front where he had circled around 8+ lines. He started asking me one by one. Let me tell you here that the conversation lasted for full two hours. Hence, it is not possible for me to pen down all the points. I will try to simply write certain points that I remember and think interesting. 

I kept answering all his resume questions- the publications, award on Fuzzy Mathematics, BJP’s election manifesto contribution, forming India team of Business Intelligent group in Microsoft, role of Big data as mentioned in my Summer project report in McKinsey, my contribution in GeM, what’s in the name Blavatnik etc. For every question, after my answer, he would add some points, I responded again, then he would again share his experiences, and conversation went on. For example, in case if GeM, he explained how he and Sachin gave the idea of marketplace to Amitabh Kant along with Makemytrip founder, what is SPV, why DGSND to be dissolved etc etc. 

Sanjiv shared many of his experiences of dealing with government, mostly negative experiences. I kept pushing my optimism for government. He put me in some of his scenarios and asked for comment. I was unable to make out what he wanted to hear. Should I confront him? I continued with my ideology of pro-government, pro-common citizen and kept pushing. 

Sanjiv takes lot of pride in the Tata brand (he was previously with Tata Communications) and also told he is passionate about Flipkart to such an extent that he won’t even talk to an Amazon guy sitting next to the table. He even said mild Behensood once in the heat of argument. He also asked whether I know about the future responsibilities of this role. By looking at the JD provided to me by Romy and the words uttered by Sanjiv (particularly the fire fighting thing mentioned in the JD which I found very awkward), I guess Sanjiv might have given input for drafting the JD. He also once mentioned he wanted to meet Modi to tell he is one of the highest tax payers of the country and should be given an opportunity to suggest a few ideas for implementation. 

The conversation had really two way traffics all the time and I can’t recollect the discussed points chronological order. Once he told the first thing he wants in a person is honesty. Then he kept on looking at me and went into silence. I didn’t know what to say. Giving arguments how I am honest would be ridiculous, I thought. He also told he has never been late in life. I thought of saying ‘being on time’ is the most important asset I have. But I didn’t say anything; hope my attendance today would be enough proof for him. But while writing this, now, I think I could have spoken one or two lines on his above two comments.

At one point, he appreciated Sachin and Binny and told their simplicity & diligence inspires him; Sachin still travels via economy class in indigo plane etc. Also, during course of discussions, he asked whether I would be open for Bangalore and Delhi at one point of time. He also mentioned how Smriti Irani requested him for something on World Handloom Day and why he said no.

One point of time, I did mention about Sachin’s call for protectionist policies and how we can pitch for innovative stuffs like engaging with think tanks, promoting FFS as angel investor for Govt of India. He repeatedly told this role would not be easy since government is complex. I wanted to tell him government complexity is something I learnt to enjoy in last 2 years. 

He asked me to ask anything to him. First I asked when Flipkart would come out of the ‘startup’ tag. He wished Flipart culture never comes out of that tag, however, there is plan for IPO etc in 2-3 years. Whether Flipkart has plans to go abroad- he told, he thinks positive, but the management thinks differently on this. I asked sellers should be given more importance along with customers, where he had a different point of view. The last question was in similar line what I asked Sachin. Sanjib asked me to repeat the question and answered Indian media is managed by Reliance. 

It was 12-00 PM. He dropped me till reception. While walking I asked whether he sits whole day in Gurugram. He answered half of the day in Gurugram, the other half in Delhi. If I get inducted, he will explore whether the eBay office in CP can be used since the show is happening in Delhi only. 

Overall, it was a positive discussion. But with a seasoned player like Sanjib, it was very hard for me to read the face or emotion. 2-3 words from him was very positive. I could have asked him about his current reportees and responsibilities – I missed that.

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Today is 21st August- 10 days after I had the conversation with Sanjiv. So, what do you think the result would be?

I was very positive, much more than I were with Sachin Bansal. I started creating dreams. I even brought the suit-tie from home just to attend the B'lore part of Flipkart story. And, everything collapsed like a pack of cards today.

The long silence from Romy's side was an indication, but I pushed for clear words today via telephone, SMS and email. Finally she called at around 5-00 PM. She told Sanjiv did not find me fit for his requirement. He needs a ruthless executioner (now I think his stand on bribery was a test, maybe) and I quite don't fit into that. I was not expecting this, to be frank! I felt sad.

I was happy with my 19 L package and preparing to leave Delhi. The way Flipkart chapter started, I thought there is a reason behind. But no, it is the unfortunate Manjit Nath and his bloody luck. If this has done anything, that is the disturbance of knowing how much my batch-mates (eg- Ashish Vijaywergiya) are earning. Compared to them, I earn in peanuts.

Why God does this to me? Still, I am trying to console myself everything happens for a reason and for a good reasons. Do I think the 17 L package that AMTRON is offering is for a good reason too? Bull shit!

I feel like cheated ! I am not even 1% enthusiastic to go to Assam now. But, I have no choice.