[I started the first 2 paragraphs on 31 Dec itself, then restarted on 27 Feb, and publishing today on 28 Feb. If you are wondering what happened in the last 2 months, wait for a post in the Career label]
When I think about the major events of the year in personal life, only two events and two realizations come to my mind.
Event1: Became father on the very first day of the year. When someone asks about my feeling, although nobody has asked until now, I have articulated to say - if you think you are a 'complete' man, you must become a father. Lot of concepts, priorities, definitions of laziness/dirtiness, aspirations, meaning of busy schedule got changed post this event. But there has not been a single day when I don't want to be a father once again. Looking at the people who don't want to become father from various strata of life, I fail to comprehend whether it is financial, emotional, logistical, ideological or lack of knowledge that prompts people for a decision of not becoming a parent. Or is my positivity due to my middle class upbringing? For me, it has been a fulfilling and knowledgeable journey so far, of course, with awesome support from Nina, Maa and in-laws family.
The accompanying events such as, staying overnight in hospital (Critical Care) after many years, several rituals including the biggest one of course annaprasanna on 19 July, the night struggle during initial days of Nichinta and Dorapara with Rodali, the vaccination prog of Government of Assam, discussion about child psychology with Nischal, and of course Moina's delivery and the knowledge sharing on vaccine, doctor, food, behaviour etc.
Nina's coming back to normalcy post delivery both in terms of health and mind continued throughout the year. Her assignment (summer workshop, NKTV, Meri mitti, mera desh, Doordarshan B grade artist, Hudum, starting regular classes at home), the week-long stay at Rajib da's place for her Kalakhetra prog, managing household stuffs in absence of helper, relationship with a strict personality like Maa, handling Rodali - I must salute her. The unforgettable 3-day trip to Uchita for Hudum documentary shooting with one month old Rodali was amazing. Not to forget the frequent sound recording visits to Bapujinagar.
Event2: I became a student again, part time PhD student at IIT Guwahati. This post has all details of the events that led to this decision. Attending and bunking classes, preparing for mid and end semester exam, writing 2 hr and 3 hr exam via pen and paper, listening to the discussion about pressure and professor- I relived my student life to a great extent. Managing the offices on the Mondays where I go to attend class at IIT, boarding the Dhubri bus at around 6-40PM, which makes me take another bus from Paikan, the audit class on history v/s memory, numerical in Pankaj da's subject, the growth model of Agnirup Sarkar along with the definition of sustainability and happiness, regular Sunday stays at Dada's place - I will never forget. The journey has come with some prices as well - sending Nina and Rodalee to Nichinta whenever I have class test/exam, bearing the nonsense of IIT's admin stuff on the occasion of online feedback deadline missing, audit course dropping, the weekly Guwahati trips- but all are manageable compared to the bigger benefit.
One important comparison that I kept making with batch-mates and particularly after Chanda got into Dibrugarh university- the importance and future prospect of the PhD to me and to others. To fully live this experience, maybe I should spend a stint outside India. Sometimes this thought made me non-enthusiastic about the PhD, but then I refer to the realization 1 as below.
Realization 1: What is important in life, now and in the future? The IIT fraternity, globalization lecture content, the IT company office/lay-off atmosphere, witnessing the Agia life from close etc, made me realize (to an extent) what I want. This is for sure that I don't want to grow in corporate career. My discussion with Astrologer Ashesh ji and DMIT with Pranjal also indicates the same, I think. I am getting convinced that an academic career would do the best for me; PhD is definitely the best thing happening with me now. The second question I am not still sure about my stay inside or outside Assam. Here, Nina has a strong sentiment of not going outside Assam due to her career. The finance angle is important and I know more or less what to do. The last thing I need to figure out - how to do justice to my intellectualism, Oxford-Microsoft-McKinsey-metric result data points to check the last point of happiness of being altruistic or self worth, and ultimately creating a legacy.
Realization 2: Why misunderstanding happens among closest family members? I carefully observed the equations between Dada-bou, Tapan-Moina, Nina-Maa, myself with Maa and Nina. Not writing the reasons I want to conclude here is that this rifts are going to stay. We can try minimizing and controlling at threshold level. The perfect scenario is not possible as this is real life. And, this is not compromise, rather giving respect to the situation and individual by adjusting. I want to teach these to everyone, specially to our children.
Unique events of the year:
1. The Pradhan Mantri Matsya Sampada - starting from taking 20-day old Rodali to Fisheries deptt, the carelessness by the department, the pleading request after intervention by Utpal Da, and finally cancellation with next year's commitment. First endeavour to become government beenficiary, a way to get some portion of the tax we keep paying.
2. Househelp search started when Doli ran away on the day of Rodali's birth. With Mridul's help, first brought Subha pehi of Dwarka. Then came Shitola khuri of Rangjuli. Lot of time was spent without any house-help, which was very very difficult, mainly for Nina. Then came Anjana from Nalanga hill in May for one week. Then comes Samina and after the disastrous doctor's report on low blood count, we had to send her back. Here comes Silpa, whose end was tragic as she got caught red-handed stealing lot of stuffs. The part time effort started with Kalpana, the lazy maxi-wearing lady. Khirobala jethi has been a great help. Oushodhi jethi was there for a few days before having big quarrel with Maa. There was a bihari part timer came for less than a week, before I and Mridul could find Subashi jethi who remained with us gracefully until the end of the year. Not to forget Amrita, who stayed with us for 1-2 months, mainly during 1-week Ghy stay period.
3. The platinum jubilee celebration our high school and my involvement in the souvenir, procession, stall management and finally the alumni felicitation- memorable events. I won't forget the chat with Samujjal Bhattacharjya and Tankeswar Rabha as well.
4. The selling of the old car and the purchase of new car were two big events of last year. After much deliberation the decision turns out to be a good one.
6. The sudden request from BSG to become an assessor, and how I missed that opportunity due to sheer stupidity of myself.
Regular sections of year review blog post:
1. People: Welcoming Sumo's second child, Chitrolekha's son, Meeting Rahim Zibran and Zubin Garg via Gopi, Richa (Mousum's wife), Permanent farewell to Xoru mami, Chanakya's maa, Karuna's son; Temporary farewell to Wahid Da, New- Child specialists, PhD batch mates, Geetanjali Bez, Tiplai family people, Jyotish khura of Solmari, Tezpur university faculties; Reconnection- Kanad, Meghna, Mridul (closeness rises), Mubin Da, Anup, Uttam Teron, Pranoy Roy
2. Travel- Except the regular Guwahati trips, one Delhi office trip and Nina's Uchita trip, the only trip of the last year was the Tamulpur to meet Madat Da.
3. Important Dates: 5 Jan (Rodali's homecoming), 18 Jan (while celebrating anniversary at Nichinta, Himanshu's lay-off at CSoD email came), 31 Jan(first month of daughter), 11 Feb (most overstretched day), 14 March (Vision 2047@IITG), 23 March (Tezpur University), 28 April (dada taking flat), 5 May(new WagonR), 12 May (Rodali learning to palta mara), 21 May (Moina's kapur diya at Agia), 30 May (Jahid da's call), 2 June (unforgettable experience of lifetime), 2 July (Rodalee's uncontrolled crying during Nina's PhD entrance), 24 July (IITG student officially), 30 July (welcoming Om), 19 Sept(first mid sem), 2 Oct (Rodalee crawling), 12 Nov(conversation with Anupam, atithi dhaba), 6 Dec(watching Brindaban theatre), 15 Dec (Saal tree and guests),
4. Health: BP was under control with regular medication, had cold for 1-2 times, some teeth issue, rest all good. Cycling stopped as winter and exam came. Physical activity needs to be started, health checkup is due.
5. Ahha moments: Y-o-Y growth of FSP numbers email sent to leadership, learning basic of Chat-GPT after discussion with Kaku, Dr. Meenaxi Borkotoky donating books for the library, Rajib Da's generosity with his rented apartment.
6. Writing and Reading: The Aspiring women collage for R'dalee is something dear to me. Reading the book- Without the hot air as per suggestion of Karuna Da (first few chapters only), Joychandra khura's autobiography and 1-2 here and there whose name I can't recollect. It is a big low. A2O writing is progressing but with the slowest possible speed. After 1st sem exam got over, I was determined to complete the second part, but I could not. How can I become more disciplined here?
7. Office work : Although I tend to think there is no learning from CSoD, I believe this is wrong impression. Every little experience adds to our learning. But of course, the monthly salary has been the biggest incentive to continue with CSoD. WFH is like adding cream on the top.
a) I will remember the last Delhi trip that consists of the lunch with the team at Sutra (Noida) and evening drinks with Swati, Monu and Sachin.
b) The difficult increment discussion (where I played no role , but Rakesh Hegde) with Sonal at multiple occasions is something I won't forget. Also the cat fight between Payal and Sonal.
c) Getting the mediclaim for Nina's delivery was a great thing financially. The pluxee wallet is something new.
d) Mukesh has consistently been the pain in the ass; one of the emotionless with juniors and ass-licker with seniors kind of fellow. He made Atul's life worst before firing him over the night.
8. Family:
a) Maa leading the surgery of Khirobala jethi was a remarkable event on the family front.
b) The whole effort with land - the Basundhara 2.0 applications, photo sessions on 3rd May(after Tamulpur trip) and then the rejections, efforts for the Agia college and near graveyard lands, effort to find approach road to Dalok land would be highlights of last year.
c) Dada's transfer to Guwahati was a positive news considering his wrong character related information coming all over from Agia people, inside and outside home.
d) Much effort was put on Maa's new book and superannuation benefit. Both are in progress by EoW, also hampered by her body parts' pain.
e) Spending lot of time with Deuta- shopping for mahekiya, watching football match at Hatigaon, the rubber and the fishery discussion, searching for land to buy, and also when that Manoj guy spoke rudely with Deuta and I intervened via Shahanur.
f) Moina spending her post pregnancy time at Agia, the uncontrollable crying of Bhrgab almost on daily basis was unforgettable.
9. Public event: Child abuse by the celebrity doctor couple, Gaza war, Human-elephant conflict across Assam, dismantling of Ulfa after the peace accord, the dominating rise of HBS with dictatorship, land grabbing via wife and lot of good things as well.
10. Finance: Positive points were the huge profit via Rubber plantation and starting of the lending business via Mridul. Started receiving house rent profit portion of 5K from Maa every month. I invested significant amount in equity via Sharekhan, direct MF, Coin and Kyte, inspired by Naresh's statement of 1 Cr equity portfolio. Also discovered and experienced the RBI direct and SGB. Details would be in the financial year analysis blogpost.
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